mishalak: A fantasy version of myself drawn by Sue Mason (The Prince)
[personal profile] mishalak
A Tale of Convention Going and How I Found Fandom
"Every Slayer has a death wish, even you. The only reason you've lasted as long as you have is you've got ties to the world... your mum, your brat kid sister, the Scoobies. They all tie you here but you're just putting off the inevitable. Sooner or later, you're gonna want it. And the second, the second that happens...You know I'll be there. I'll slip in... have myself a real good day. Here endeth the lesson." -Spike, Buffy TVS: Fool For Love

I think Spike (well whoever wrote those particular lines) is right in a larger sense. We all need the things that tie us to life, our friends, things to look forward too, a place where we are needed, and so on. For me most of that can be summed up in fandom, but I didn't find this social group until I was nearly 21.

I have been fannish for the vast majority of my life; I just didn't know that is what I was. I read a heck of a lot and watched all sorts of science fiction. My first convention was a Star Trek convention that I attended my freshman year in high school. I was so geeky then that a fellow geek from my school criticized me saying I shouldn't dress so buttoned down even on the weekends (my school had a dress code). But though I had fun I didn't feel connected to my fellow geeks and though I did look I didn't find what I wanted there. More geek friends, people to socialize with on a regular basis.

For just short of five years I continued to go to Starcon, Starfest, and various gaming conventions without making permanent friends or even hearing about the local fannish convention, MileHiCon. I just continued to hang out with the few people interested in science fiction at school and college. Then February of 1999 I went to Genghis Con, a gaming convention, while feeling rather blue and lonely I decided to help out with the art show. There I was told about this group called DASFA and that they met monthly at this bank. The next month I showed up and was immediately drawn deeply into the group. I was Secretary of the club in three months (by appointment), elected to that position the next year, and Director of the club the year after that. It was like coming home.

It is my deeply felt conviction that being part of fandom anchored me to life like nothing else ever had. That it is not an exaggeration to say that fandom saved my life. It's is then very strange that despite going to conventions that though I wanted to find something like fandom I managed not to find it for nearly half a decade.

I went to some conventions, but they were not of the essentially fannish variety nor did I hear about fandom at them. From the time I was in high school I regularly went to the local Star Trek con and also various gaming conventions. But until I went to Genghis Con and volunteered with the art show I never heard of organized fandom.

This is why one of my overriding goals is to spread the word about fandom. Because I know there are people out there just like me that could use fandom, that would love fandom, that need fandom to tie them to the world and just have not heard about it. I want to give back what I have received. And that is something to take joy in, a reason to go on living through the bad times, because I know that every month there will be a new party, and every year there will be another great convention.

Here endeth my speech.

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-18 11:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thette.livejournal.com
*smooch*

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-18 12:01 pm (UTC)
ext_5149: (Default)
From: [identity profile] mishalak.livejournal.com
<grin> Thanks

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-18 12:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elynne.livejournal.com
Doctor Who probably saved my life.

... I might write more about this in my own journal, later.

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-18 12:56 pm (UTC)
ext_5149: (Default)
From: [identity profile] mishalak.livejournal.com
Please do!

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-18 02:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dlacey.livejournal.com
This is why one of my overriding goals is to spread the word about fandom.

Good for you. I didn't discover fandom until I was in my thirties. I often wish I had done so at least 10 years earlier.

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-19 09:20 pm (UTC)
ext_5149: (Default)
From: [identity profile] mishalak.livejournal.com
We had a teenager at DASFA last night. She's just 18! It is a wonderful thing.

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-19 09:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cakmpls.livejournal.com
I have such a different life history from many fans that I often think I shouldn't call myself a fan, at all. In short summary, I was socially successful out there in the everyday world, even as a teen. I wound up in fandom at 30 because the people I met in Mensa bored me. Twenty-six years later, local fans remain my main (but not only) social group, but I hardly participate in fandom at all (one convention, Minicon).

Nonetheless, I do occasionally wonder how my life would have been different, and perhaps better at times, if I had discovered fandom when I was a teenager (back in the Dark Ages).

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-19 09:18 pm (UTC)
ext_5149: (Default)
From: [identity profile] mishalak.livejournal.com
My friend Rose grew up in fandom. I can't seem to think of what would be the usual way to come to fandom.

2nd generation

Date: 2003-10-20 01:54 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Hi there! Gosh, *usual* way to find fandom ... Mom saw an announcement in the paper about the formation of DASFA and took Dee and me. She personally recruited several people (high schoolers) by accosting them in our small local library when she ran into them in the SF section. I'd bet other people found it through conventions, which do get some regular publicity, and nowadays a lot probably stumble across it on-line. I helped drag a couple people I met in college in, like Dave W., and then of course there's you ... my shining fannish achievement! As the saying goes, it's every parent's dream to be surpassed by their children ... so go and prosper and be famous, my fannish son! - Rose B.

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-19 01:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] marycrawford.livejournal.com
I sympathize.

When the Worldcon was in The Hague in '95 (I think), I didn't know about it. I'd read SF, fantasy and everything else my whole life, but I wouldn't find fandom (thanks to a newspaper ad, of all things) until years later.

The Worldcon. Man.

(And no, the con hasn't returned to the Netherlands yet...)

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-20 08:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] davidschroth.livejournal.com
Large chunks of this read like a pretty good TAFF platform....

I didn't find fandom until I was almost 44. I had an opportunity to find it in my early 20s, but it didn't catch...

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-20 04:44 pm (UTC)
ext_5149: (Default)
From: [identity profile] mishalak.livejournal.com
After reading all these stories of coming even later to fandom than I did I am feeling pretty lucky. Though I'm still going to get on a drive to reqruit more HS and collage students. There are fans who don't know what they are out there!

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-29 03:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shadowpryde.livejournal.com
You and I are some of the lucky ones to not only find fandom at a fairly early point in our lives, but to find such a great fandom to be involved in as the local Denver one is. It's actually one of the things that keeps me in Denver.

Out of curiosity, when does DASFA meet these days?

Annabel

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-29 08:53 pm (UTC)
ext_5149: (Default)
From: [identity profile] mishalak.livejournal.com
DASFA does its thang on the 3rd Saturday at 7:30pm as it has. This weekend the Alternate is at my place, I'll do a posting about that with directions and things. I'll probably do that friends only so I'll just have to friend you. Use what you learn about me wisely.

DASFA now meets at 1111 S. Washington Street, Wild Oats Market Community Room. The best way there is to get to Washington Street, say by exiting I-25 at Alameda, and going south since the Wash/Emmerson exits are closed due to T-Rex.

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-30 10:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shadowpryde.livejournal.com
Thanks for the response about DASFA. I had once started to get involved with them a long time ago, in a galaxy far away and then life got busy and I wasn't really able to go much at all. Time has flown since then and I've been giving some thought to checking it out once again.

You certainly don't need to friend me for that reason, as I'm pretty tied up on Saturdays for all of November and probably December if I deigned to look that far in advance at my calender. I will tell you, though, I do know who you are on sight as I've seen you alot at the last several years of MileHiCons (http://www.milehicon.org) and we've even, in point of fact, exchanged a couple of emails about a year or so ago. I've been volunteering for MileHiCon (http://www.milehicon.org) for several years now and my husband, [livejournal.com profile] xylass, likes to flirt with you ... so you've probably seen one of the two of us around.

Take care and I look forward to reading more of your musings, especially as thus far they've proved to be intelligent, revealing, and generally well-written.

Annabel

(no subject)

Date: 2003-10-30 10:50 am (UTC)
ext_5149: (Default)
From: [identity profile] mishalak.livejournal.com
I friend everyone. I'm not really very shy about my thoughts. I just don't want a few people to see them. Bossman and parents are the ones I can think of.

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