Zombie Trees

Today while aimlessly chit-chatting I came up with the most perfect of all metaphors for Ulmus pumila otherwise known as the Siberian Elm. It is the zombie of the tree world. For those of you who have never seen my little house it has a tree leaning out over the front yard from the south property line. I think, I am almost fairly, absolutely, nearly sure that when the thing is finally pushed over by a strong wind or an errant bolt of lighting it will come crashing down into the huge space in front of my house rather than into my house. This tree is one of the banes of my yard with the way that it continuously drops limbs onto my alleged lawn. It makes what would otherwise be a mere Sisyphean task into a dangerous game of launch a stick roulette. It is a rare day that it does not drop bits of itself and yet it lives. Without water, without care, in spite of the aphids and other insects that attack it (and also make it foolish to park under the darn thing) this elm lives on. Never quite actually healthy but it keeps doing tree like things. Apparently. So, the zombie tree. Thus it is named and so it shall be, fear the zombie tree, coming to a yard near you.